Since I was a child, I have always been certain about what I wanted to become a minister. I hold this divine calling in the highest regard, and I deeply desire to be part of it.
Unlike many other MBSI students’ stories, I was never pressured by external factors, nor did I face any hindrances. By God’s grace, I grew up in a 4th Watch household. My parents are both elders, and my three siblings are already ministers. From a young age, I was taught to love God and His Church. I never missed attending local or national activities, even if it meant compromising my studies. I was a consistent youth officer at both the local and area levels.
Because I spent so much time in the chapel, I discovered many of my gifts and talents. No one had to assign me church duties – before they could even ask, I had already done them. That is how deeply I love the work of God. I thank the Lord because I enjoy the privilege of being a second-generation Christian. I never had to worry about my dream of becoming a minister.
Until one day, everything changed. I was diagnosed with a Grade 3 hemorrhoid. At first, because of my faith, I tried to continue living normally. I was still able to actively participate in the Christmas mission for over a month. However, by January, my condition worsened-I could no longer kneel or even walk properly. This marked a turning point in my journey in the ministry.
As the Bible says in 3 John 1:2, spiritual health precedes physical wellness. Many people believed that my condition was an easy fix-just undergo surgery, and it would be over. I wished it were that simple. But as soon as my ability to perform personal worship was taken from me, I began questioning God. I asked why He allowed this to happen when I was using my life, my body, in service to the Church. I had never withheld time, strength, or entire being from Him-so why now? Why did this happen just when I was about to enter Bible School?
As my body weakened, my spiritual strength also diminished. Everything I had built through my service and faith was suddenly shaken. I no longer knew who the God I had been serving truly was.
Sadly, I lost my confidence, focus, and faith. I reached a point where God’s words and the counsel of my pastor and parents felt like nothing more than passing wind. I no longer wanted to talk to God in prayer because I felt as though He was not answering me.
I was so blinded by my situation that I failed to see that God was still working. I still can’t fathom how I managed to take and pass the Licensure Examination for Teachers last March 2024 when I didn’t even have a proper review. All I remember is that before I shaded the first item on the test, I uttered a short prayer. Every word of that prayer clung to the tiny bit of hope I had left-hope that maybe God was still listening. Holding the pencil that my pastors had sharpened for me, I closed my eyes and said, “Lord, I have nothing else to bring but the prayers of the workers and brethren for me.”
When the list of passers was released in May 2024, 1 knew at that moment that God had been with me all along. A line I once heard from our late Bishop Dodoy was proven true once again:
“Take care of what is important to God, and He will take care of what is important to you.”
It was also in May that I underwent surgery. And during my recovery-when I was enduring the most physical pain-came the passing of the beloved Apostle Arsenio T. Ferriol. This added to my sorrow, but I am grateful that someone stood up to help us understand God’s message-the beloved Apostle Jonathan S. Ferriol. During the wake and interment, he spoke about acceptance in the face of loss. It felt as though he was speaking directly to me, as if he knew exactly what I was going through. I will never forget his words:
“Question we must, but do not doubt. Sorrow we must, but do not despair.”
Many people assume that those like me-young, strong, and unburdened are the ones most fit to dedicate themselves to the ministry. Through my testimony, I wish to represent the small percentage of “smooth-sailing” young people who have chosen to commit their lives to God. Let me borrow the ever-famous phrase: “Who among us is truly strong? Who among us has never been afraid?”
There was a time when I even questioned my calling. I thought, “Maybe I’m just forcing myself into full-time ministry. Maybe my illness is God’s way of stopping me because I’m not meant for this.”
But our gracious God never ceases to amaze me with His plans. I am now almost done with my freshman year in Bible School. The training has not been easy-it has tested me physically, mentally, and spiritually. But I am forever grateful for the legacy left to us by the Goodman of the House-the legacy of prayer.
Many times, I failed to trust God when I faced the unknown. But in those moments, it was not just my prayers-it was the intercessions of others that rescued me and brought me back to victory.
I know that dedicating my life to full-time ministry is not enough to thank God for His faithfulness. But as long as I continue to answer His calling, I am not only living my dream-I am making His Apostles proud.